By Michael Nickerson
Fun fact: women don’t want to kill innocent people. Who knew? It was a complete surprise to me. I’ve always been under the assumption that my wife, mother and friends of the female persuasion were merely one step away from sticking a steak knife into any child silly enough to cross their path after a long day at the salon. But thanks to the mandarins at National Defence, we now know better.
But gosh darn, the insight and wisdom doesn’t stop there, no sir. Thanks to David Pugliese and his reporting in the Ottawa Citizen, we now have a window into our military’s take on the wants and needs of those who constitute (at last count) fifty percent of the country’s population. Now we know how they think, what they expect in life, and ultimately what is keeping them from ‘daring to be extraordinary’ as the advertising goes.
Well let me tell you, as a privileged white male it’s been a real eye-opener. For instance, women don’t like being away from their families and friends for long periods of time. Morning pushups are a real turnoff. Being sexually harassed is not a plus. Suffering from PTSD is a definite downer, and the whole combat/killing thing just does not sit well when it comes to recruiting women to be involved in that combat/killing thing. Who knew?
What’s implicit to some degree in this is the idea that men live for pushups and grueling runs, are quite happy to kill people, innocent or not, don’t mind a little PTSD or living rough on the street, and are content to be separated from their families for as long as possible. It’s a guy thing apparently.
So given all this eye-popping market research, what do you think is the solution to attracting more women to join the military? Marshmallow roasts! Shorter skirts! Male chaperons! Telling women that camouflage is stylish, face paint is just a sexier form of makeup, medals are like earrings, and combat boots are the latest thing on the Paris fashion runways. Sign up, ladies, and we’ll have you on the cover of Vogue in no time!
Now you’re probably guessing who came up with these suggestions. Some might assume it was a cadre of sexist old men wondering what the wee little fillies might want to make them more comfortable in uniform. But no, it goes to the “Tiger Team” for these suggestions, a group consisting of mostly women (90%) enlisted from all branches of the military to brainstorm on how to meet Chief of Defence Staff Jonathan Vance’s goal of having twenty-five percent of the Canadian military be staffed by women come 2026. Sadly, they chose lies over honesty. Marshmallow roasts?!
It’s in the great tradition of advertising: push the positive and minimize (or simply do not mention) the bad. This is all well and good when selling such things abrasive toilet paper or the career opportunities available at the local call centre; you can always walk away from both. It’s quite another when you’re trying to recruit people, male or female, into the military.
To put it mildly, the job requires commitment, sacrifice, hardship, and the potential for long-term disability without recourse to union protection. There continues to be issues of sexual harassment, and veterans have rightfully called for recognition and support.
Yet it is also a noble profession, a much needed profession in our country, and one that offers much in terms of experience and training that truly lasts a lifetime. But it speaks volumes for the insecurity and failings of military leadership when more time is spent trying to trick people into the job than in being upfront and treating people as the adults they must be to ultimately handle the job.
It’s a seriously tough gig. Not many people can handle it. So be honest about that and leave the marshmallow roasts for someone else. You’re not training people for firefights around the campfire after all.
